Not long ago I brought home a lovely new jar of "chewies" for the canines in my life. Now, most of us know that I have a little ADD/forgetfulness/old age/whothehellknowswhatiswrongwithme; so after handing out a few of these delectable treats, I forgot to screw the lid back on the jar...and this is what I came home to:
THE SCENE OF THE CRIME;
DINING ROOM TABLE
/
\
/
\
/
THE EVIDENCE:
EXHIBIT ONE --
TREAT JAR WITH SEVERAL
SLIGHTLY CHOMPED CHEWIES STREWN ABOUT
/
\
/
\
EXHIBIT TWO:
CLOSE UP OF EXHIBIT 1
AND THE USUAL SUSPECTS:
#1 LUKE.
KNOWN JUVENILE DELINQUENT,
CHARGED WITH BREAKING AND EXITING PASTURE;
HAS RECORD WITH ANIMAL CONTROL
DEFENSE -
VEGETARIAN. HEAD WON'T FIT IN CHEWIE JAR
#2
AIMLESS, FECKLESS, POINTLESS, GRACELESS -
DEFENSE:
CLAIM TO NOT KNOW WHERE THE DINING ROOM IS.
FOUR WAY ALIBI
#3
SAMDAMMIT
KNOWN REPROBATE.
HAS DESTROYED SHOES,
CLOTHING, AND ONE COUCH.
DEFENSE:
WOULD HAVE EATEN ALL THE CHEWIES
THEN CHEWED THE CONTAINER TO SMITHEREENS.
#4
CLEO.
KNOWN RINGLEADER OF THE INFAMOUS "PYGMY GANG"
HAS PRIOR BREAKING AND ENTERING DINING ROOM
DEFENSE:
VEGETARIAN. WOULD HAVE RAIDED CUPBOARD FOR GRAHAM CRACKERS INSTEAD.
AND FINAL SUSPECT
/
\
/
\
NORMAN
aka MR. McNASTY
HEAD AND ARMS WILL FIT INSIDE CHEWIE JAR
DEFENSE: IN 14 YEARS, HAS SHOW NO INTEREST IN DETECTIVE WORK
OTHER THAN TRYING OCCASIONALLY TRYING TO FIND HIS DINNER DISH
And there we have it, Esteemed Readers. It's a mystery. What's your guess?
