A Letter to My Daughter on Her 21st Birthday

Dear Jessica,

I can’t believe that you are actually 21 years old today. I have spent the last couple of weeks trying to write you a Letter of Great Importance and Wisdom, but it reads a lot like those little inspirational books you see at the local bookstore. So instead I am going to tell you the story of this gift I am sending you, followed, perhaps, by a few Words of Great Importance and Wisdom.
So you should have opened the gift by now and see that it’s an antique topaz ring. It was Grandma’s ring (you, Aunt Diane, and Grandma all have November birthdays).



Well, this topaz ring was given to Grandma on her 21st birthday by her beau at the time, so that makes this ring 65 years old. (G’ma was born in 1925). Grandma always made a big deal about the ring -- what an expensive gift it was at the time, etc., etc. And it is a big, pretty stone. Since Aunt Diane was a November birthday as well it was generally assumed that she would be given the ring on her 21st birthday. I was a little put out of shape because I really liked the ring and Diane always got everything (in my view anyway).



Enter Aunt Florence and Uncle Joe, who weren’t an aunt or uncle at all, but rather old friends from when Grandpa and Grandma were stationed in Germany in the 50s. Believe it or not, Aunt Florence was born in November as well! And when Diane turned 21, Aunt Florence gave her her topaz ring. It was a smoky topaz and about the size of a dime with scalloped edges (I didn’t like it all).



But, sure enough that opened up Grandma’s topaz ring for me! And on my 21st birthday, I got the ring and G’ma and I took it to a jeweler to have it reset and maybe put a little diamond on either side.



At the jeweler’s, to Grandma’s horror, we found out that the ring was a fake. It’s a really nice fake and set in 14k, but it’s still a fake. But I liked the ring so we ended up fixing the mount on it, and I wore it for a long time. We did not, however, hear much about that boyfriend anymore.



And now on your 21st, I am handing this ring down to you. It might not be a real topaz, but it’s an heirloom. It comes from my mother and has a really great story.

Now for my words of wisdom: I could take up pages telling you how to respect yourself and live life to the fullest and be thankful for what you have, but I think my advice comes down to this –



Life is not about making good decisions; it is about making good choices. When you are given one, try to choose the best one. There aren’t always right and wrong choices, sometimes only a better choice. It may not be the easiest or most pleasant choice, but you are a smart girl and know right from wrong. Follow these words and you’ll do fine wherever your life takes you…



I love you,

Mom